Not many people get to make a living making music. And almost no one gets to do it making THEIR music. Meaning this: Are you Tom Petty or are you Tom Petty's keyboard player? Or the keyboard player in a wedding band? Or a hotel lounge? Obviously, those are various degrees of professional success and prestige, but in all cases, unless you're Tom Petty, you are getting paid for your performance, not for your artistic expression. Some people can do those jobs and be happy playing their own stuff in their garage or corner pub. For others, self-expression is the point and everything else just sucks the life and the joy out of their art. So the real question is, which one are you? Both are valid. Both are creative. If you can blend the two, then go get a great gig and you can still make your own music on the side. But if you fall into the latter category, you're waaaay better off getting a desk job or bartending to pay your bills and keep your art pure. If you want to be happy, you need to figure out which category you fall into and make your choices accordingly. Because if by earning a living in music you lose the joy and fulfillment from making your art, it just isn't worth it. Not even close.